Massaging tips for husbands
Before you can learn how to give a sensual massage, you have to learn the ingredients. Learning, and putting them together in the right way, will have a big effect on her pleasure and getting the outcome you want.
Setting the mood
Just as candles and music set the mood during sex and make everything feel 10 times sexier, you can be damn sure that a little mood music and a couple candles are going to take your sexy massage to the next level, too.
Science has shown that vanilla is one of the sexiest scents ever, which means you can never go wrong with a vanilla-scented candle. So, light one of those, put on a playlist of sex-tastic tunes, and get down to business.
Make sure you know what your goal is; either to make her relaxed & ready for sex or to put her to sleep. If a romantic massage is an appetizer before the main course, then choose something sexy like soul music or if its for relaxation then go for soft and slow blues, or even nature sounds such as running water or the sounds of the rain forest.
Oil is your main ingredient. Its as important as a mechanics wrench.
The list of appropriate oils you can use is long. Hemp, Jojoba, Hazelnut, Apricot Kernel, Argan, Avocado, Safflower, Rosehip Seed, Walnut, Camelia, Coconut, Macadamia Nut, Marula, Almond, Moringa, Grapeseed, Sunflower, Sesame, Mustard, Borage oil or mixed oils are all good choices. Experiment with a few and find what you like.
You can find all these and more at the health food store. Also, spa shops and skin care stores have a big variety of blended massage oils containing two or more oils. These can be very appealing. Or just purchase some online from the link here.
Almond oil is one of the most popular and my personal favorite as a woman. It is slightly oily, but allows your hands to slide smoothly. Plus, it doesn’t get absorbed too easily so you won’t need to keep reapplying it.
**Make sure to buy organic oil in small quantities and store them in a cool area.
Treat the massage like foreplay
Also fact: Many of us don’t pay enough attention to this very important part of sex, therefore it doesn’t last as long as it should.
And this, guys, is why a sensual massage is a great precursor to sex. You’re literally feeling her up with oils, you’re getting her relaxed and in a totally Zen state of mind, and you just happen to be touching her erogenous zones over and over again, so it’s basically guaranteed to turn steamy quite quickly.
“Women’s arousal sometimes takes longer, and sometimes a man may be at his maximum arousal state, but the woman may only be half way there,” Simone says, implying all men should take note of this brute truth.
“Erotic and sensual touch can provide so much unintentional foreplay: she is breathing, slowing down her mind, relaxing more into her body by having her whole body touched, and by the time her partner is stimulating her nipples, labia, clitoris — she most likely is at her maximum arousal state. Her experience and desire for sex may be twice as great!”
Take your time
In life, there are certain things you really, really shouldn’t rush. For instance, a blossoming relationship, foreplay, or a delightful chocolate soufflé in the oven. If you push it and try to make it work before it’s ready, it’s going to be complete shit.
And just like those arbitrary examples stated above, you shouldn’t rush a sexy massage, either.
“When giving or receiving an erotic or sensual massage, let there be so much time and spaciousness for not only the entire experience, but with each body part,” Simone advises.
“Each body part, erogenous or not, deserves equal time and attention. Taking the entire body into consideration will promote full body orgasms and profound sensational states.”
Sure, we all get it, you want to make her orgasm. As good as it feels for her, you feel like your ego is giving you a pat on the back when you manage to get her off.
However, as been told time and time again, do-not-rush-it. Just focus on touching her, see how she’s responding to your touch, and just try to enjoy everything that’s happening. “Let not the goal be to orgasm, but to enjoy all the moments that lead up to it. the whole experience is orgasmic, not just the actual orgasm.
“Sensual bodywork on its own can be the sexual experience, or the appetizer that leads to sex or other play. Sensual bodywork can be erotic, steamy, playful, silly, but can also illicit a depth of emotion and memory that lives and rests in our genitals if we have the time, sensitivity, and patience to explore it.” It’s important for us to practice touch in such a touch free-world. Technology distances us and forces communications that don’t connect us to the healing power of touch.